right here. right now.

Well people, let me just start by saying it’s been a hell of a year so far. I mean, one HELL of a year. I’ll spare you the details for now, but here’s the short version:
October 2010: Husband #2 and I separate
December 2010: I take my Mom to the ER where she is diagnosed with Cancer
March 2011: My Mom passes away
May 2011: Husband #2 (who will hereafter be referred to as X2) and I divorce
I now know that if I can get through stuff like this, I can get through anything. But it has all been at a cost. If you knew me before all this, you will still recognize me, but on the inside, nothing is quite the same. EVERYTHING looks different.
It’s been rough, but there have definitely been a lot of positives that have come out of these events. For example:
-Not much scares me anymore (ask anyone, I was afraid of just about everything a year ago)
-I am more patient (I know, you don’t believe me)
-I’m more grateful for what I have, who I know, and what I’ve done
-I live much more in the present moment
That kind of junk.
Now, I’m just trying to put everything back together, and figure out what “normal” is, and I have no idea what that means…
But I still manage to see the ridiculous everywhere, and I still think of myself as an invisible dork.  (I don’t participate, I observe).  I still like making people laugh, and the easiest way I’ve found to do that is at my own expense.

One thought on “right here. right now.

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